Raaaarrrr

The last few days, and yesterday especially, I've been in a growly mood. I've stomped around the apartment and sat slumped at my desk and stood confused in the very middle of the room and growled.
GRRRRR!!!!
I don't feel like a lion, a monster or really anything that stalks, and most of the time I couldn't even tell you what I have been growling about. That is the problem.
I feel more confused and frustrated with myself than I have since I was thirteen.
Sometimes I want to kick and tear at the fabric of this reality and rip it to shreds. Everyone here is blind, and me most of all.
We are so wrapped up in things that don't matter; we spend our days worshipping pre-rubble, junk that will be gone in an instant and leave us no better off for our devotion; we wallow in our own wounds and turn away from the transformation that we so obviously need.
RAAAAARRRRRRR!!!!!!!!
I don't know where I should be or what I should do. I'm not entierly sure who I am. I feel like I may never know these things completely. I always thought that at this point in my life I would be living my childhood dreams, not questioning whether those dreams are even worth pursuing. I am afraid that I'm destined to be a wanderer . . . certinally that's all I ever have been, and the prospect of a liquid life spent treading water is, well . . .
GGRRAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRR!!!!!
There must be more here. I am hoping that I can be strong enough to find it. But for now I wish for intemporal boots to thrash at this veil of existence and kick open wide, gaping holes to heaven.

White Board through the ages

RRAAAARRRRRRGGHhhh.
When Ed and I moved over to this apartment from the Sycamore house, we brought the white board with us. The board has served as an open forum for art, commentary and grocery lists for quite a while now. I'm not even sure where it came from. Anyway, we've always enjoyed seeing how the white board has evolved as people have added notes and sketches to it, and we decided to chronicle its life here in our apartment.
Behold! The work of many hands, and many markers.

The reflection of the light from our fan obscured Kyle's name on the board, so I wrote it in with MSPaint. Wouldn't want him to feel left out!




This board looks sparse, because it was almost completely erased by a house guest before we had a chance to document it. Sad.


Notice how we've gone from a whole rainbow of markers to only three. Ed decided we could only use Halloween colors in October, and hid the rest of the markers. It's almost December now and he still hasn't remembered where he put them!

Anyway, hooray for art and friends. Thanks to everyone who's contributed to our ongoing, unoffical art project here. Please leave your mark the next time you drop by!