Moving Day

Our twelve month lease is up, so I am moving out of the apartment today. I have lived here longer than I have lived anywhere since I left home just under five years ago. I am glad that I do not have a lot of large things to take with me -- in half a decade on the run you learn to cut down on material posessions which cannot be easily moved from place to place -- my biggest indulgence has been filling my bookcase with books and graphic novels of all sizes and I still do not know how exactly I'm going to move it.
I'm excited to be moving and feel that change is in the air. I feel as if this is natural -- in more than just a physical sense, I am moving out of this space I have outgrown.
But while cleaning under my bed I came across a pile of broken promises -- a comic I never finished drawing from back in the fall, a calendar with missed deadlines for a screenplay I still haven't written, and notecards detailing the trip I took with Erin to take her back to Wisconsin almost exactly one year ago.
Here is the future, everblooming.
Here are the possibilities of the past, wilted and dusty.

I suppose I could say that my regret is never becoming who I once thought I could be, except that now, looking back I know that person could never be me.
Today, I am learning to grow up into me. That may sound like a message from public television, but being true to yourself can be the hardest thing. I am still learning what it means.